Scrapbooking as a Personal Discovery

Why?
OK – I have a creative thing. I love to create and yet I do it so infrequently. My main reason I don’t create – I think – is that I don’t have a deadline. I don’t “Have” to. I procrastinate a lot. I also like to collect ideas and tend to get overwhelmed. I was lucky to find an online creative community in January and it was just what I needed. I felt a little like a rip off artists. Not an artist at all – just a copy cat. I followed the projects that milliande created and followed her directions just to get myself going. I have heard that sometimes writers will take someone else’s writing and use them to just get a jumpstart so I though I’d try that. I’ve take pictures from other artists and copied them just to get painting. When I’m finished I am always amazed at how good I am at painting. I am a good artist – or am i? Am I goo d if I copy someone else’s art? Maybe I’m good at technique but not a good artists… but I am getting off track.
So – I followed these prompts like a trooper. It was the most discipline I’d had in a long time – then she had to stop. Hey, the woman has a life ya know. Once I had that happen I realized that I could do this. I could create my own prompts. Inspiration is out there I just have to go and get it.

The first steps I am going to go through is to dig up what I already have. I have a ton of materials, lots of books and a lot of ideas of my own just waiting to happen. I am going to write like I am now…then I am going to put together a few plans. I think I will sketch out a few layouts for what I can do. I may create a painting or a scrapbook page. I am finding that the scrapbook idea is scaring me.I get a little ADHD with the scrapbook because I start looking at pictures and then get overhwhelemed with how may I have. I want to do too much. If I could just select one I suppose that would be good – OK – I will select ONE picture and make a page around that.

To DO:Select ONE picture
Meditate on it. Maybe find a way to write up a script for a creative meditation on it…..put together a podcast???
Create a page around it…..
If it’s good maybe you can make a youtube video.
OK – that’s a start…it’s easy – it’s just one thing… I can do this…

Writing

I am going to commit myself to writing. I was listening to a podcast on journaling last night and decided that it is going to be the thing that helps me get out of this block. Just my short blog I did yesterday helped me flow into an idea.

I am thinking of starting out with some prompts that I already had worked on - then from there I am going to take some journals I've already started and start working on them. The only way I can get this project rolling is to just do it!

I think I am going to create audio meditations as well - and videos of me creating some pages...this works together. I can't wait....so I better get started. SO -- today I start with my first page - what is important to me..... what sustains me.

Addicted to House

I am watching House - thanks to DirectTV I get to fly by commercials. I find myself just wandering through days wasting time. I procrastinate. I don't know why. I don't know what to do. I don't know where to begin all of the brilliant projects that are just awaiting me. So I watch House.
I have pain in my left shoulder. I feel dull, like nothing will be great or inspiring again then sometimes something flies by me like a hummingbird in my garden. SO... I sit and ponder thoughts of what is importannt to me.
I have started thinking about doing a scrapbook. I thought that a new book called "Scrapbooking as personal discovery" could be cool. Each page would be an inspired page - or based on a meditation. Whenever I would leave a session with my friend Cliff I would be so inspired to create. I want to find a way to access that flow. That's what I want to capture. That's what I want...to write that book - to create that book - to create those inspiring pages...

Artist Block...no blog.... block...

I am blocked - and I think this will help. I just read something very funny. It had something to do with art cars. I decided, "Hey, I should write that down. That's amusing." By the time I remembered how to get to my blog site and log in I forgot.

SO...

Tonight was very nice. I hosted the PTA Reflections art show. The kids I saw today were great. I felt so happy to be around them. I also appreciate all the help I get whenever PTA mom's are around.

Oh..funny... My dog, Daisy, is in the other bedroom (I am in the guest suite) and I can hear her biting her nails. Yes, she really does bit her nails...like a nervous kid. She's so cute and sweet but neurotic. She's a lot like me. She's also got issues with facial hair (haha) and snores big time.

I do feel happy. I am happy to be going back to work next year. I am happy I still live in this great house. I am happy that I have started drawing a lot more and I am happy that I am still a great artist - although I'm sorta a blocked one... blogged too.

I have an aspiration to stay involved with my own art.

I hear a coyote howling right now - it's a new moon - very dark outside. That damn coyote probably ate my Ms. Precious Perfect last week. God, that put me into a depression.

Anyway, aspiration - I will continue to draw on my journal. It feels less threatening to draw in a journal. I enjoy being able to rip out a page - now I just have to learn how to get rid of it once it's gone.

I think that is what I will practice the next few days, getting rid of old art that doesn't work for me anymore.

I am still looking at the big black canvas but there are at least a few more ideas on how to fill it coming into my head. More will come.

Quit looking at that black canvas....

I am a night person - really... a very very good one too. If I didn't have to go to bed, I wouldn't. I'd reverse my days. The worst part of this habit is the inability to get anything done. So, as I blog here, I should be going to bed.

I've spent the day working in my art studio. Trying to FIND it... I have just enough space to paint a few things, journal and go from there.

I am working on a new painting. It's huge! I don't know why I chose to use the largest canvas I owned to start my first painting in years... Last year I created this enormous purple tree. I like working on it but I hated the end result. It just always felt undone to me. SO, I decided to get rid of the annoyance and just paint over everything in black. Now I have this huge (well, not THAT huge - it's 3'x3') black canvas. The big bugger of it all...what to put on this big black canvas, then it hit me. My Daisy dog just came into the studio one day and looked at me with her big smile - that's what going onto the canvas. I just have to find the right smile from her to work from.

That's what I'm doin'. Life is getting better. I look forward to finishing this new painting. If it scares me too much, I just might do a small version and let that big black canvas stare at me for another month.